Updated: Mar 29
You may have come to this post because your heart is honestly saying:
”I really find my husband boring."
Wait, don't call the marriage counselor, or arrange for marriage therapy!
Empty those thoughts for a minute and think with me:
You husband will not change simply because you want him to. (You already tried to get him to, right?)
He may not feel anything needs to change in your marriage. He kind of likes his lifestyle. At least, this is how many men feel about their serious relationships when nothing extremely drastic is blowing up around them.
Your husband can be motivated to make changes in his life is he sees the right (incentives) to change.
There is only one person in your marriage you can change, which is you, however, you can strongly and lovingly motivate your husband.
Remember, yelling or nagging will cause him to negatively react or withdraw.
There is a better way to motivate him!
Pour your heart and soul into making his weeks the best days possible. You can only change ONE person, you!
You are not manipulating him, you are seducing his mind and flirting with his heart.
Every man wants to conquer the world for the woman who longs to be with him?
You can be one of the happy couples and have a happy married life!
Here are 4 smart and painless ideas which work:
They are pleasant suggestions to thoughtfully pursue your husband. Train your mind to become a focused student of the man you married, look for tidbits to improve his days.
1 - There was a reason you married him, go on a research hunt within your own mind and list all the reasons you dated and married him.
Spend time to reflect upon your past and go as far back as needed to think about what made you feel this was the person you wanted to invest the rest of your life with.
Ask yourself, how do I love him? What did I like about his personality, smile or some quirk that made me giggle when I thought of him?
Communicate those ideas to him as you make your list somewhere permanent. As you add to the list, text, or write on a mirror with erasable marker, one cheerful idea for him from your list progressing through it.
You might include some personal thought such as "Today I remembered this special memory of you when we first met, …" or say "Do you remember when hen we did ...?"
You don't need to make a production of it, just send him your love in a language his heart receives.
2 - Show him how delighted you are, he married you. What does he provide for you? Stability? Money? Does he fix things? Is he a good lover? Follow these suggestions to creatively tell him.
Make an ongoing, creative list, of how to say how delighted you are to be his wife. Schedule these enchanting love notes for him over a 2 months span:
a hand written letter sent to his workplace which contains 3 - 4 of your ideas
a note on the mirror where he will see it daily that highlights one aspect of his personality you adore
a note in his briefcase or lunch box that says you would marry him all over again because …; A few texts which speaks to his heart as a man and not as one of your female friends.
Be imaginative and have fun with these happy creations. Use some smiley faces, hearts or kisses, to say "I Love You!" as these ideas touch his inner soul. Don't feel inhibited since his heart is the one you want to touch.
3 - What 5 actions could you do over the next two months to dazzle him with how much you respect him as a man. He craves you to admire him as your stud.
When you carry out these actions, notice his reactions. Think of these as reaching in to cuddle his heart. These beautiful gestures can be simple like bringing home his favorite candy bar and jot a cute note and attach it to the wrapper with a lipstick kiss on it.
Turn it up a notch and whisk him out on a date to his favorite restaurant. Get tickets to a local sporting event you know he delights to attend. Send a cryptic text in advance to a fun night since you have a special night he will enjoy with his interests at heart. You know this man, think of some fantastic time that will “WOW” him, by your expressions of unconditional love.
Keep in mind your goal is to nudge him to subtle changes.
4 - Make sensual memories together therefore, plan and execute, a “day off” picnic or other escape from the ordinary routine together.
Building elegant memories need not be expensive or traveling a long way from home. It is the time together focused on each other which counts! Make good use of the travel time to invest in his heart as well. Choose an idea or two from the above points and incorporate them into your comfortable romantic conversation.
If you want easy, get some take-out food and sit at a park bench or spread a blanket out to soak in the romance.
The idea for this day away, is to show your husband how much you enjoy being with him! Tell him often how glad you are, he married you. Share with him you feel like a queen with him or you are feeling like he wants you to be his queen. Plant seeds of enchantment, within his heart and mind.
Remember, the only attitude you can change is yours, thoughtfully connected with your loving actions to capture your husband's imagination and his male ego.
Develop a selfless mindset for these activities which will show him you love him and desire to be with him. You are discovering ways to fall back in love with the man you pledged your life to on your wedding day.
Marriage is precious and worth the intentional effort to develop a love that sparks a happy married life alive with tender memories for your future together.
Here are two other posts you might find perfect with additional tips:
THE BEST IS YET TO BE!!!
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